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We have all heard of the new fuel-cell powered vehicles, but actually how great are these cars anyway. The fact is they are the best ever.
These cars are a win-win situation. By owning a fuel-cell powered vehicle, not only do you get to save the environment, but you also get to own your own personal spaceship. Of course, these cars cost about as much as a spaceship, but hey, if your not willing to spend the big bucks to save the environment, then clearly you don't care about global warming. If you don't think global warming is important, then thanks to Al Gore's new Academy Award winning documentary, we know that you would just rather let polar bears drown. If you secretly have something against polar bears (maybe a bad experience at the polar exhibit of the zoo as a child, or just of course hate bears because they're the number one threat to our safety) then obviously you must hate snow. In turn, this means you have a distaste for Christmas, and therefore equally despise Jesus.
And so, if you won't buy the new fuel-cell powered vehicles, then clearly you are a satanist.