This Article Doesn't Contain Enough Truthiness
This article needs to be more elaborate and truthy.

Please edit out any facts.
BearShark's Guide to
Godless Killing Machines
Level 1
Level 2
Level 3
Level 4

The Fire Proof Crocodile with his weapon of choice against the aged.

Fire-Proof crocodiles may be necessary to protect the southern border of the United States from illegal aliens.The Fire-proof crocodile is nice to true Americans (and not those who claim they're true Americans such as people from Washington, D.C.)

They must be fire-proof because they will live in a fiery moat, placed in front of the coming border fence. Their fire-proof ability is achieved by covering their body in an armor made by Knox College honorary doctorates.

Fire-proof Crocodiles are extremely venomous, and 100000000000000000000% American. They have the instinctive ability to sense what Mexicans are the good kind that are just sight-seeing and which kind are going to try and illegally immigrate to America.

They have been known to single out the elderly and challange them to long, drawn out and intense Scrabble games. The Fire-Proof Crocodile never loses. There have been aligations of steroid use but those where shot down immediatley.

When confronted by a worthy oponent, they guzzle the nearest flammable liquid and belch it on their foe, killing and/or sizzling/melting them enough to force a retreat.

Please, respect the Fire-Proof Crocodiles, they are our best defense against bears, bears in submarines, bears in airplanes and squirrels.

The Council of DoomEdit

The Council of Doom originally brought these fire-proof crocodiles down from their Council moon base, and sold them to the U.S. government for an endless supply of Doritos and Trojan condoms, to feed the mass armies which can be found at the moon base museum/zoo/historical tour center. The above information is correct, and they should be trusted to keep the aliens out of the country.

Normal CrocodilesEdit

See AlsoEdit

Ad blocker interference detected!

Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers

Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.