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Election Memo

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MemoHeading
"THIS IS AN OFFICIAL INTERNAL REPUBLICAN PARTY MEMO, DO NOT DISSEMINATE TO THE PRESS OR NON-MEMBERS. AFTER READING AND COMMITTING THIS INFORMATION TO MEMORY, PLEASE DISPOSE IN THE MANNER PRESCRIBED IN YOUR REPUBLICAN HANDBOOK. GOD BLESS AMERICA."


The Liberal Media are pushing their favorite lies about God's Own Party, despite our Nation being at war and an election coming up.

If you are not a Ranger (or higher) in the party, refer all press inquiries to your party-appointed lawyer or PR Man.

Rangers (or higher) use the following directives when handling the press:

  1. do not answer any questions;
  2. deny knowledge of any activity;
  3. demand as loudly and as often as you can for investigations into anything your constituents believe is happening;
  4. do not begin any investigations until AFTER the elections;
  5. when the pre-election threat/attack/bin Laden capture is announced, be outraged, but demand that ALL Americans work together to defeat the enemy;
  6. place blame where it belongs, using the GOP Blame Game;
  7. Repeat the GOP Mantra as often as possible, in every conversation, all day long.

God Bless America.

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