The Greatest Secretary of Defense EVER! used to stand at his desk 14 hours a day and write memo after memo after memo after memo, from a giant piece of paper that someone would keep unraveling and unraveling and unraveling...
His assistants would call them "snowflakes" because they would come down from the heavens and each one was unique and precious.
If you've ever received one of Secretary Rumsfeld's memos, please be sure to post it below.
Do not post memos that, if revealed, may harm America's National Security.
Donald Rumsfeld's SnowflakesEdit
Toilet Facilities Edit
To: All Staff
From: D. Rumsfeld
Re: Toilet Facilities
The facilities on our floor are for our use only, do not allow anyone from outside our sector access to the head. And that includes Congressmen.
That is all.
JOKES THAT REFERENCE THE MAGNIFICATION OF MY TRIFOCALS Edit
TO: ALL STAFF FM: SECDEF CC: OFFICE OF THE SECRETARY OF AWESOMENESS
IT HAS BEEN BROUGHT TO MY ATTENTION THAT JOKES HAVE BEEN MADE OF LATE CONCERNING THE MAGNIFICATION OF MY GLASSES. I NEED THEM TO READ. AND YOU ALL NEED TO GROW UP. I HAVE FEELINGS TOO. ALSO, WHO IS RUNNING PROGRAM APPRAISAL THESE DAYS? STAFF SHOULD NOT HAVE SO MUCH TIME ON THEIR HANDS.
THAT IS ALL
PRESS ON, RUMMY SENDS
MY CAR KEYS. Edit
Specifically: Where are they? I lent them to someone at the Liberation Day party so they could use the bottle opener key chain to open what I seem to recall was a bottle of Amstel. That key chain was a gift from Gordon Liddy. GIVE EM BACK, RUMMY SENDS
Please return to Blockbuster - they're waterboarding me with late fees.
POST HASTE, RUMMY SENDS