Dead Kennedys
makes satanic music
which are lullabies to the Baby Satan


The Dead Kennedys helped pioneer the punk genre, as well as sire a horde of unrelenting zombie-cannibals.

The Dead Kennedys was a punk band formed in the 1980's, consisting of John F. Kennedy on vocals, Robert Kennedy on guitar, Joseph Kennedy on bass, and Joseph P. Kennedy Jr. on drums. Their political satire and clever lyrics helped draw in fans, but what really helped was that they were all zombies.

Early Days Edit

In 1975, there were finally enough "cool" dead kennedys to start a band. Having realized this, the baby Jesus resurrected them and gave them instruments. Deciding they were too "edgy" to reach the mainstream, and also realizing no one would sign zombies, the band went in the direction of punk rock. In 1979, they released their first single, California Uber Alles, and their fame rose. By 1980, 1 out of 100 Americans were fans of the Dead Kennedys. 75 percent of their fans only knew them because they had eaten the flesh of their friends and family.

Height and fall Edit

After the success of their first single, the DKs went on to record 6 or 7 new albums. The fans were going crazy, but that craziness was later pointed out to be zombification at work. With legions of cannibalistic fans, the Dead Kennedys stormed MTV head quarters, causing thousands of deaths. By 1986, it was clear that this was how the world was going to end. But, in a suit of hope, Stephen Colbert appeared and burst open in an explosion of sunlight. This slightly annoyed the zombies. But, out of the recently exploded Stephen, rose a slightly smaller Stephen with several shotguns and rocket launchers. An intense battle raged on for seconds, but in the end, Colbert prevailed.

Aftermath Edit

Some assholes released 2 live albums of the band a couple of years ago.

See AlsoEdit

Ad blocker interference detected!

Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers

Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.