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The world's best-known Asian.
- his "fu" is greater than any mere mortal
- one of only three men that can beat up Chuck Norris
- can hypnotize bears with a glance
- invented the "Urban Assault Vehicle" (UAV)
- undefeated pebble snacther.
- beaten up more people onscreen than Chuck Norris, Bruce Lee, Jackie Chan, Steven Segal and Arnie combined
- while a staunch supporter of the Second Amendment, he does not need a gun and will kill you faster than you can say "Glock"
- Struck down by a Thai Ladyboy, skilled in Dim Mak (Five Fingers of Death) Mid-Orgasmi while self asphyxiating on a closet rod in Bangkok.
- Worlds most Bad Assed Danlgling Participle
- With the ressurection of "24" . Will be Zombie ressurected on Quentin Tarantino's front lawn to Crusade For Truthiness, Kill Bears and Knock Kinky Boots with a Thai Ladyboy agan.
God bless you Kwai Chang Caine!Edit
Movies & TVEdit
- "Kung Fu" 1972 Played "Kwai Chang Caine," Chinese half breed/laundry entrepeneur, Kung Fu Master and great, great, grandfather of Walker Texas Ranger
- "Kill Bill Vols. I & II" Played "Bill" AKA "Snake Charmer" who did some of the finest uberhotties on the planet. Was cut to pieces by Uma Thurman.
- "Death Race 2000" 1975 Played Frankenstein A real American who in the first true UAV,mercilessly mowed down liberals and communists during a lively cross country race.
Trips To ThailandEdit