Colberto Ergo Sum

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The Thinker Colbert
Sintio en venter, ergo sum rectus.
Colberto Ergo Sum
is part of Wikiality's series on Colbertist Philosophy.

Colberto Ergo Sum (philosophical formula)

trans from the Latin: "I Colbert, therefore I am."

Colberto Ergo Sum describes the state of being of Stephen Colbert and by extrapolation, that of heroes and Colbert Loyalists. This state of being is derived exclusively from the practise of Colbert.

Use of the Verb "Colberto" in the FormulaEdit

"To Colbert" (Colberto) means to share one's truthiness with others. This concept is fundamental to the functions of the Philosophy of Truthiness.

Process of Establishing Oneself as a Colbert BeingEdit

In order to establish oneself as a Colbert Being in accordance with the formula "Colberto Ergo Sum" one must observe one's gut closely for the rumblings of truthiness, and then observe oneself sharing that observation of truthiness with another being. Our Glorious Stephen confirms himself publicly as a Colbert Being four times a week, in his award-winning show The Colbert Report. His is a shining example for all Colbert Beings. However, the simple observation of one's own gut feelings and the sharing of such feelings with a friend is more than sufficient to establish Colbert Being. (As long as the gut feelings originate from the Truthiness dispersed by Colbert. See Vigilo Colberto Ergo Sum.)

Implications of "Colberto Ergo Sum"Edit

The phenomenological implications of Colberto Ergo Sum are observed in truthiness itself (which, even if it remains unshared, is still truthy), the reaction commonly called Factose Intolerance, and in the myriad forms of shared truthiness, especially The Colbert Report.


According to the great Dutch philosopher, Knopfler, "Sometimes you're the bat, sometimes you're the ball." In the state of Colbert Being, one is always the bat. Although Colbert Beings have been falsely accused of alignment with the French Existentialist (Sartre), Colbertiness is in fact the diametrical opposite of Surrender-Monkeydom.

"Colberto Ergo Sum"
is a part of's dictionary, "Watch What You Say". For the full dictionary, click here.

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