is a Beautiful Republican
God Bless America

In the name of Stephen Colbert,, and Colbericans everywhere, I hearby claim the recently discovered Earth-like extrasolar planet in the name of Stephen Colbert! --Careax 17:04, 30 April 2007 (UTC)

Capt.054a241605e445c1a3b36f66c7aa2994.habitable planet scl201

Behold Colbearth: a Republican paradise named in Dr. Colbert's honor.

Until now this planet has been known as "Gliese 581 C". First of all, whoever this Gliese guy is, he sounds like a foreigner - and worse still like a Frenchie! And who is going to remember that name?! It's like something the factonistas at Wikip*dia would have come up with!

Second, this brave new world is only 20 light years away. In astronomy terms that's spit-wad distance! It is in America's interest to seize this planet before the French, North Koreans, or Iranians do. The last thing we want is a bunch of beret-wearing aliens begging us for help from a maraudering amoeba!

Third, Colbearth has a surface gravity at least twice that of Earth. That means you have to be strong to survive there. And there are few stronger or more capable than Our Glorious Stephen!

For these reasons, and because any good gut would conclude this, Gliese 581 C is now to be known as Colbearth, and will be ruled in absentia by Stephen Colbert (on behalf of The Greatest President Ever and America).

Name This Planet After Stephen!Edit

See Also Edit

is a part of's dictionary, "Watch What You Say". For the full dictionary, click here.

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