is a part of's dictionary, "Watch What You Say". For the full dictionary, click here.

"Churchiness" is an essential component of faithiness.

To show truthy Churchiness, a person must not only go to church on Sunday but also weave a reference to that practice into every conversation. Every conversation.

Sunday services cannot be the only church events attended by a genuinely churchy person. At least 92.7% of all social events attended outside of the home must be church-sponsored or held at an approved church. (including meals and Japanese baths)


Attendance at a place of worship that holds its primary services on a Saturday or a Friday automatically disbars a supplicant from admission to Churchiness.

Preachers are still praying over the issue of attendance at a church using initials similar to LSD or using the word latte in their titles. Initial fatwas, however, indicate that coffee-worship at a place like a church of "Latte Day Saints" probably disqualifies a supplicant. It turns out that these people do not worship coffee and are redder than red (although, paradoxically enough, very white). Revised fatwas have, therefore, concluded that they are, in fact, very Churchy.

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