Chuck Norris/Roundhouse

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Chuck Norris/Roundhouse
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Chuck Norris In Front Of The Best Flag Ever

  • For General Chuck info, click here.
  • For Chuck's accomplishments, click here.
  • Click here for Chuck's Superpowers.
  • For "facts" about him, click here

The Chuck Norris Roundhouse of Doom

  • No one has EVER survived a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris. Any time such an act has been seen on television or movies, it is actually a result of Chuck Norris separating the victim's soul from their body with his kick and then creating a new soul in a split second.
  • Anyone who claims to have survived a Norris roundhouse kick will instantly attract Norris to their person, causing him to then kill them.
  • Chuck Norris once died because he delivered a roundhouse kick to a rod of Plutonium but once he reached Heaven, he realized he was God. Feeling his work was not yet done on Earth (after all, Christina Aguilera still lived) he crafted a new body, twice as bad ass as his previous one.
  • There are no such things as aliens. Chuck Norris single-handedly killed them all because he was, "sick of those stupid Fox documentaries."
  • Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris have never fought, for they knew that if they did, they would uncreate all of reality itself. However, when Bruce Lee died, Norris slammed one massive palm on his chest while saying "Live you little Chinese bastard," and thereby resurrected Lee. When he returned to life, Lee morphed into an exact duplicate of Norris and they now play jokes on people, since it is now possible for Chuck Norris to be in two places at once.
  • The Mount St. Helens eruption was actually caused by Chuck Norris. He drank too much Red Bull (which existed back then because he invented it) and roundhouse kicked the top of the mountain off, causing the eruption. It is the reason the famous drink is called "Red" Bull.
  • Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked himself in the head. This caused him to be sent crashing into a mountain, with the mountain collapsing on top of him. He then gnawed on his own chest hair, able to glean nutrition from it (as even his teeth cannot cut it) for six weeks. He then regained the strength necessary to roundhouse kick his way to freedom. This became the basis for the film "Alive."
  • Every time Chuck Norris executes a roundhouse kick, the incredible speed at which his leg cuts through the air creates an enormous sonic boom. This is commonly known as "thunder".

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