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The Wisdom Of ChristineEdit
- Christine is not possessed
- She did not attend the University of Oxford but she did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.
- Christine tells America who she is--in song! (she's not a witch or a politician, she's you!)
Her Anti-Masturbation AgendaEdit
Our only solution against this abominable act of adultery in the eyes of God is to marry our hand to make the sexual union between man and hand to be a valid one.
(No one tells Sweetness!)
However, if one were to engage in pre-marital sex prior to the Christian blessing of God-Approved marital relations, one would be forgiven if one's partner were in a Christian rock band.
So, in conclusion, not all pre-marital sex is created equal.
O'Donnell recently compared gays in the military as equally offensive as adulterers in the military. Stephen Colbert using his gut power made a shocking discovery, by using O'Donnell's logic we have a secret dark side to masturbation:
in the Military in the Military THEN by the transitive property of gut power
This could only mean one thing, Stephen Colbert is gay married to his hand!! He has been doing it with a dude all along!!! Stephen Colbert fell on the liburals' trap!!! Damn you gays, you got him!!!
Oh, and one more thingEdit
Tea Bagging AgendaEdit
- Jubs: She will bring new jubs to her State, starting with herself!
- Education for Real Americans only
- No More Sex
- No More Bailouts
- Restore Christian Morality to America Joos, you are on your own "Anne Frank is on the third floor in a room behind the bookcase."
- Destroy the Libural Media
- Cut funds for
a cure to AIDSGay Fads
- Destroy the RINOs
- Evolution Schmevolution
- Bring Back Creationism to the classroom
- Eliminate Laziness
- to finally put Bill Clinton behind bars
- Stop the mutated mice army
- Arrest the sun for sexual molestation
- Outlaw Magic. Harry Potter, you are on Notice!
- No More Czars
- To solve the Gay Issue, America must become Asexual
- Save our Churches from The Big Communist Government
- Impeach the Activist Judges in the Supreme Court
Pamela GellerDead to us.
- Has-been hippie gay-loving traitor
Her lesbo sistershe is dead to her...
- Teh Gey traitor
- Meghan McCain
WDEL1150AMWe are going to sue you, buddy! You think we wont? We need the money!
She needs to sue O'Donnell to stop her from giving interviews in the future!
- All you wanted to know about Christine but you were too libural to ask
- Christine to change her name to The Younger Sarah Palin
- Her father was Bozon The Clown! She can help us fight the mime menace!
- The Misadventures of Christine
- Christine O'Donnell is a Gutstitutional Scholar
Christine O'Donnell: Gutstitutional SkoolarEdit
on the repealing of the entitlement program
known as the 13th Amendment
Christine O'Donnell has study the Constitution for
many decades years months weeks days hours minutes a long time and she has a proper grasp and understanding of the spirit of the Constitution than the Democrats. Her debate at Widener University Law School impressed a lot of legal scholars and law students that at the end of the debate, they left the auditorium in tears and cheers. They were so impressed with her knowledge of the Constitution that even the media cant help but talk about it too!
See, nowhere does it says "Separation of Church and State", nowhere!
Christine O'Donnell has recently declared that Freedom of the Press is not in the Gutstitution. It says "the freedom of speech, or of the press", not Freedom of the Press!! Gutstitutional scholars believe this evidence enough to ban the liberal media and anyone who refuses to follow the new law will be imprisoned!
Yale University University of Oxford Claremont Graduate University Princeton University
- Fairleigh Dickin
- Grifter University
- Glenn Beck's University
- Tea Bagging University
- Colbert University
- Stephen Colbert "University"
- Clown College
...look she has a diploma... right?...
- Moar Moneys, Please!!!!! I dont wanna go back to eating ramen!!!
- Christine O'Donnell's Plan B to win election
The Christine O'Donnell
Savings Account Campaign Fund:Edit
- $15,000 goes missing from Warchest Christine promises to find missing money.
O'Donnell announces 30 minutes adIT WAS NOT AN EPIC FAIL, WE CAN STILL DO IT!
- Christine O'Donnell helped to stimulate Delaware's economy
- Christine O'Donnell depressed, unused piles of money just sitting there with no place to go.
- Leave Christine alone! This is nothing but a Witch Hunt!
I WON, M#THR F#CKERS!!!
When we asked O'Donnell what she would do next, this is what she shouted, "Fox News and Big Bucks Here I come!"
The Future Part IIEdit
If anyone has a gig for Christine O'Donnell, just send it to us by mail at: 666 Blackroad Hill, Witchcraft Mount, Delaware 66613. Send us anything, she is willing to do any gig, you know like speeches, magic tricks for the kids, curses against unfaithful lovers. We take anything... and I mean anything!
The Future Part IIIEdit
To reiterate, Christine O'Donnell is
desperate open for negotiations for any kind of jubs! Buy her book!
WITCHCRAFT ORGANIZATION PRAISES O'DONNELL'S MEMOIR
SALEM, MA - Massachusetts-based Witches United had kudos for "Troublemaker," Christine O'Donnell's recently published memoir. Wink Hazeldale, spokesman for the non-profit organization, praised the work as "spellbinding" and a "cauldron of ideas." According to Hazeldale, Witches United offered to provide a cover blurb, but O'Donnell's familiars informed them the book had already gone to press.
When asked for his reaction to O'Donnell's controversial 2008 "I am not a witch" campaign ad, Hazeldale said, "Who can blame her? It was a witch hunt. We've all denied our true nature publicly at one time or another. It's either that or risk having a house fall on us." He said he and his associates greatly admired the failed Senate candidate "warts and all."
Commenting on the current field of GOP candidates, Hazeldale said they were "in complete harmony and alignment with Witches United's basic mission, purpose and beliefs." His organization is "extremely comfortable" with the GOP, he said. "Except for Bachmann. That one scares the devil out of us. It's those crazy eyes of hers."
Christine O'Donnell hasn't given up her dreams, she is already amassing a new fortune to run in the future, once she discovers the secrets of the philosopher stone to fill up her coffers.
Her magic wasnt strong enough
- Tea Party wins!
- Tea Baggers declare Delaware to be theirs!
- Even Democrats support O'Donnell!
- Liburals terrified! Welcomes Tea Baggers Overlords
- Republican Goddess Talks about Teh Sexxxor
- Christine O'Donnell no need no stinking bribe money
- FINE, SHE DONT NEED YOUR STINKING MONEY, SHE CAN WIN ON HER OWN!
- THANK YOU JESUS, WE CAN NOW STOP EATING RAMEN NOODLES!
- Mike Castle now a fugitive
- American Hater disses Tea Bagging Goddess!
- O'Donnell sells pies to pay campaign bills
- Christine O'Donnell good for the economy. The Free Market haz voted
- Christine O'Donnell thanks her greatest supporter, King Pyrrhus
- Hippie traitor still on the run
- O'Donnell's victory brings party unity
- Liburals already surrendering Delaware!
- Sarah Palin declares major victory on Delaware
- Christine O'Donnell receives a check for $1,000,000 from God! Will spend it wisely
- Emergency News: Witch puts a Curse on Christine!!!
- Christine 101
- Satanic Community demands apology from Real Worshiper Christine O' Donnell
- Christine O'Donnell's New Protegee!
- Help! Christine being attacked by Tea Haters!
- Christine finds a new job
- Christine supports Papa Bear all the way
- Colbert finds solution to the witch problem
- Get your hands off Christine, you damn dirty ape!
- Christine's opponent is a witch!
- How Christine saved us from Our Chinese Masters
- Christine O'Donnell wins debate
- The Misadventures of Christine: Mama finds a new Sugar Daddy
- Christine Witch Action Figure: Out Now!
- Speeling is for elitists
- Christine O'Donnell declares that God told her she will win. O'Donnell already preparing victory party
- Christine O'Donnell wins senate as the loudest
- Christine O'Donnell gives victory speech
- Christine blames GOP for lack of voting support
Meghan McCain predicts Christine's Total Victory!Meghan McCain: LOSER!!!
- Christine O'Donnell signs
movie tvbook deal!
- Christine O'Donnell to cast spell on Welfare Queens stealing our money
- Christine O'Donnell's famous quote becomes historical
- Christine O'Donnell to sue Obama for plagiarism
- Christine O'Donnell
find new cash cowto fight libural threat
- Computer steals campaign money, O'Donell now poor! Please, donate!
- O'Donnell uses magic to betray GOP!
- Christine O'Donnell fights back gotcha media
- Throng of invisible translucent white people fills up bookstore
- Book sales a success!!!!
- Christine O'Donnell to participate Tea Party event along Sarah Palin!