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Chewbacca

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Unamericanchewbacca

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R2904895510

Chewbacca's 5th grade class photo.

MrPazzah---ChewieNixon

"I am not a AWRGGRAOWOORR."

Chewbacca is a heroic mutant bear from Canada. Even though he is a mindless killing machine, he mindlessly kills liberals, making him a good guy.

Early LifeEdit

CHEWY-ART

Chewbacca during WWII

Chewbacca was concieved by an American woman and a Canadian grizzly bear in 1865, though many believe he is from the middle east due to his extreme hair content. Even though his father was a bear, it seemed that he got his mother's patriotism, and broke free from the clan of killer bears, joining the righteous crusade of Abraham Lincoln against the sleazy, corrupt hillbilly liberals of the C.S.A.

In a Galaxy Far, Far AwayEdit

Later, after traveling to Star Wars and meeting Obi-Wan Kenobi, Chewbacca fended off a bear attack on Coruscant, driving them back to Earth. In a climactic battle, he defeated The combined bear forces of Karl Marx, Nancy Pelosi, Josef Stalin, Donald Duck, Stanley Kubrick and Winnie the Pooh in Italy, the most recent addition to the Axis of Evil, thereby defeating the Communist threat of that country.

His Continuing MissionEdit

He continues to work for the CIA, protecting the President from bears, waiting until the Galaxy needs his help again...

ChewieBusted

Armed, furry and dangerous. To liberals, anyway.

Learning WookieeEdit

Chewbacca speaks a special bear dialect called Shyriiwook or Wookie. Here are some Wookiee phrases translated into American for your listening pleasure:

"Wookiee/American Translation"
Wookiee Phrase English American Translation
ACWOANANOO! Hello!
ORRACACROROROOR WWHUANANRO CHUAKAKOORCAOC RASCWORCAHOARA'C OHRARC OOWW AOWORCRCOORC. Kashyyyk fully supports America's War of Terror.

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