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is too Canadian, speak American, eh.

The Burtle Edit

The Burtle is a proud animal from "Maine's Mexico". It is born when a bear and a turtle mate in a honeycomb. It looks like a really tall bear (Approximetely 15 feet, with some specimens reaching 18 feet), although it is not godless and will not attempt to rape you.

A massive shell supports and protects its back, offering unparalleled defense against potential predators and natural effects. Thick, shaggy fur coats extremely well muscled limbs, offering to any potential viewer a sense of awe. Sharps claws tip broad, powerful paws capable of hundreds of pounds of force delivered in a single blow, while gleaming teeth seem more than capable for dispatch of prey. It will soon be raped by bears, making them even more super powerful and evil (that is when they turn godless). To put it into perspective, the Burtle is 97 times stronger than the average bear, and 2 times stronger than the average turtle.

A Burtle about to have a snack!

Diet Edit

The Burtle mainly feed on the Cape Bretoner's and sometimes move into the cities when it feasts on all of the elephants living in the sewer system of Nova Scotia. If really hungry the great Burtle will devour the man eating walruses that cover the east coast of Canada, this is a very tough battle and sometimes the Burtle gets hurt....but it -never- loses.......ever.

Hunting Edit

To hunt the Burtle is an International felony, yet some idiots still do it. If caught and charged of this despicable crime you will be placed into a room with 15 Burtles. Although one may entertain the concept of a swift, painless death, the reality is quite the opposite. This is noted specifically in the Burtle species, with a high self-control they can easily manage their massive strength and whip-like speed. Using highly advanced scent receptors, a Burtle can detect the scent of a murdered Burtle upon a human, thusly allowing them to exact a terrible revenge on the perpetrator. Claws shred flesh and teeth shatter bones in a cacophony of agony, with victims living for upwards of 300 hours, teetering on the edge of death.

BEARsqu   Bears   BEARsqu
Ursa  | Winnie The Pooh  | Yogi Bear  | Colbear  | Smokey The Bear
Polar bears  | Pizzly  | Polar Grizzly  | Koala  | Panda Bear  | Bats
Vampbear  | BearSharks  | Bipolar Bear  | Care Bears  | Roller bear
Bear baiting  | Bear is driving  | Bearism  | Great Bear Incident  | The Left Wing Madness

Evil dolphin
Stephen hates utah
Burtles is in Wikiality's Animal Perdition

This horrid beast will spend eternity wandering the vitriolous wastelands of Utah.

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