Big Foot Experts (alternately "Bigfoot Experts," "Bigfeet Experts") are people who claim to know a lot about the extremely dangerous creature known as "Big Foot." Some of these experts, like the intelligent purveyors of truthiness at Bigfoot.org have true insight into the nature and ways of the Bigfeet. Unfortunately, many of these "so-called experts" are nothing more than propagandists for the liberal media's position that Big Foot is not a bear, but in fact some kind of "primate."
Big Foot Experts Expert Edit
In addition to his supergravitastic standing as the Greatest Living American journalist, Yu Suck is a Big Foot Experts Expert. Throughout the years, Dr. Colbert's unwavering quest has led him all over the country in pursuit of truthy fracts (preferably in easy-to-digest, 30-90 second segments that can "drop in" whenever The Report needs to pad) about these elusive creatures known simply as Big Foot Experts. Undeterred by the doubts of nay-sayers, Professor Dr. Colbert's work on Big Foot Experts has led to widespread public acceptance of the view that Big Foot Experts do, in truth, exist.
In a June 27, 2003 interview with Conan O'Brien, The Honorable Professor Dr. Stephen T. "C-Train" Colbert, D.F.A., had this to say about the Bigfoot/Foot/feet Experts:
- "There's not a lot of consensus in the Bigfoot expert community.
- "I've interviewed ... some of the biggest Bigfoot experts in the United States. ... I've interviewed the people who believe that Bigfoot is endangered. I've interviewed the people who believe that Bigfoot, that the Bigfeet, as they call them, are overpopulating and that they're destroying their environment...
- "I met somebody in Florida who believed that Bigfoot was in Florida, as opposed to the Pacific Northwest, and that Bigfoot was stealing his pot of lentil soup... that he would make... and this man greeted me at 10:00am stone drunk, shoeless, shirtless, wearing two albino Burmese pythons.
- "I think a fair amount of Bigfoot experts are, um, early-morning drinkers."