Ben Affleck
is a CELEBRITY! Oh. My. God.
Al Franken
Ben Affleck has earned

Ben Affleck
Ben Affleck
Occupation: Happy, America-Loving Liberal
August 15, 1972 -  ???
Nickname: Sugar Bear, Big Ben
Salary: What he deserves
Fun Fact # 1: Loves America
Fun Fact # 2: Loves Our Troops
Fun Fact # 3: Hates Our Troops
Fun Fact # 4: Even though he is an unpatriotic asshole, we all must admit that Affleck, was indeed, the bomb in Phantoms yo.

Ben Affleck is an actress currently working in the bowels of Hollywood.

See Ben Affleck.
Ben Affleck hates America.
Hate, hate, hate.
No one knows why Ben Affleck hates America, but he does.

See Ben Affleck.
Ben Affleck is gay.
Swish, swish, swish.
No one knows why Ben Affleck is gay, but he is.

Why does Ben Affleck hate our troops?

Being HappyEdit

It is obvious Ben Affleck is very happy. No one questions it, so it must be true. He loves America.. and that brings us to our next subject.

Hating AmericaEdit

Ben Affleck hates America. This is obvious. Ben Affleck also hates everything good and wise in the world. Like Big Mac's. What a 'hater'! Can one Hollywood-liberal who hates our troops really give that much aid and comfort to our enemies? He intentionlly acted terribly in the movie Pearl Harbor so no one would like it


One Hollywood-liberal who hates our troops really can give that much aid and comfort to our enemies.

Bear Terrorist? Edit

Ben Affleck
gives aid and comfort to America's enemies. As A True American™,
it is your duty to report Ben Affleck to the authorities.

Has he been responsible for attempted terrorism on America with an army of Lovers of Immoral Bears — or LiBs?

Yes Again Edit

See above picture.


  1. Wanted: The Perfect Guy (1986) (TV) .... Danny Coleman
  2. Hands of a Stranger (1987) (TV) .... Billy Hearn
  3. School Ties (1992) .... Chesty Smith
  4. Dazed and Confused (1993) .... Fred O'Bannion
  5. Mallrats (1995) .... Shannon Hamilton
  6. Chasing Amy (1997) .... Holden McNeil
  7. Good Will Hunting (1997) .... Chuckie Sullivan
  8. Armageddon (1998) .... A.J. Frost
  9. Shakespeare in Love (1998) .... Ned Alleyn
  10. 200 Cigarettes (1999) .... Bartender
  11. Forces of Nature (1999) .... Ben Holmes
  12. Dogma (1999) .... Bartleby
  13. Boiler Room (2000) .... Jim Young
  14. Reindeer Games (2000) .... Rudy Duncan
  15. Pearl Harbor (2001) .... Capt. Rafe McCawley
  16. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001) .... Holden McNeil/Himself
  17. Changing Lanes (2002) .... Gavin Banek
  18. The Sum of All Bears (2002) .... Jack Ryan-Wildlife Terrorist
  19. The Third Wheel (2002) .... Michael
  20. Daredevil (2003) .... Matt Murdock/Daredevil
  21. Gigli (2003) .... Larry Gigli
  22. Paycheck (2003) .... Michael Jennings
  23. Jersey Girl (2004) .... Ollie Trinke
  24. Surviving Christmas (2004) .... Drew Latham
  25. Clerks II (2006) .... Gawking Guy
  26. Desperately Seeking Sodom (2006) .... Man #4
  27. Hollywoodland (2006) .... George Reeves/Superman/Suicidal Pinko

The Baby Satan has a special place in hell for
Ben Affleck
and YOU just for visiting this internets tube!
Angelina jolie 032
Don't be too mean,
Ben Affleck
is a registered Pussy.

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