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Bees and their equally evil comrades 'Wasps' and 'Hornets' are the winged spawn of Satan, come from Africa, and are very EVIL. These little blossom sluts make the dangerous yet delicious narcotic honey, but they have been known to sting people to death for no reason at all, just deliberately think "I'm bored, lets kill something' and go looking for targets. The double nature of bees reveals the truth about them: Bees are part of a secret, unholy alliance with Bears to destroy humankind and then assault the heavens. Bees sometimes hide inside the wine cabinets of interstellar spacecraft.
Bees/Bears Alliance Edit
Bees and Bears have joined together in an evil alliance to wage war against mankind. The Bees provide the Bears with the resources they need to survive. I am speaking of course about honey. The Bees hunt little children and sting them in order to capture their essence. They create the honey with the essence of small children. They then offer the honey to the Bears so that the bears can gain strength. Honey is like steroids for bears. The bears then go on to rape and pillage humankind. The Bees also play a part in attacking humans. They sting people to weaken them so that they can then bee easy pickings for the Bears. The alliance is less likely to attack Liberals because Liberals share the same goals as the Bees/Bears Alliance.
Bees: Your Ticket to Financial Security?Edit
Bees were featured on the March 5, 2007 Bears & Balls segment of The Colbert Report as a sound financial investment. Stephen recommended hoarding bees, since news reports seem to indicate that the bees are going missing across America. After all, the fewer bees there are, the more valuable they will bee.
As a practiced beekeeper and investment strategist, Dr. Colbert gave would-bee investors several tips for maximize their bee-investment profit potentials:
- You're going to need finesse to get them in your safety deposit box.
- You should start by coating your face with frosting.
- Remember: playing the market is not for the timid.
Warning: Do not buy a new home that is full of swarming bees. This is a serious problem in Florida right, as these little blossom sluts are squatting in many homes left vacant by the sub-prime mortgage crisis. Make sure to check your lender for compound eyes and stingers.
Bees: Hitler's other Eva BraunEdit
- Hitler used bees for his most evil/deviant deeds....FACT!©
|Bees is in Wikiality's Animal Perdition
This horrid beast will spend eternity wandering the vitriolous wastelands of Utah.