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Al Franken
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Astrology has earned
the (Senator) Franken COMMUNIST-SOCIALIST-MARXIST SEAL OF APPROVAL
Osama bin Lisa
Mahmoud Ahmedi-Astrology-nejad is a terrorist.
Stephen Colbert Birth Chart

Stephen Colbert's Birth chart May 13, 1964

Astrology, the study of weird pictures of naked people formed by stars (lame scientist porno), is not as truthy as one may think. Those little astrowhatever people need a real job, as they ignore their gut and go straight to what those stars and planets, which are influenced by the baby satan, say. How could Stephen Colbert believe in Astrology with Neptune in Scorpio anyway?

Hippies will be sad to realize that the 'Age of Aquarius' is a huge sham, as Aquarius was never ruled by Uranus, it is ruled by Saturn, the planet of crap. When the dawning of the age of aquarius hits, there's going to be a lot of tears and tie-dye handkerchiefs.

No relevant information can be put on this page until Stephen Colbert puts his birth time (or birth certificate scan) on this page to validate that the three wise men were following the star of Stephen upon his immaculate birth onto this planet. Astrology is total bunk without his birth time, no other nativities matter, as we cannot see his ascendant, which is the rising constellation at the time of Colbert's birth. Colbert could turn out to be a very eminent and noble man, but we will never know based simply on his Sun-Sign.

This is Stephen Colbert's un-timed chart (noon) on his birthday for May 13, 1964. The little symbols are all the other planets at the time of Stephen's birth. Only this chart is going here, since only Stephen matters. Stephen was born a Taurus, but every other planets' location on his birthday is recorded here, so not only is Stephen a Taurus, but Mercury, Jupiter and Mars are all in Taurus too. This must mean he loves the feel of a freshly shaven face.

His birth chart is incomplete without the time, as the earth makes a full revolution each day, and so the pinpointed time would put one of these signs (Aries, Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius or Pisces) as the rising sign, and it will change every 2 hours. This time will determine if Stephen is going to be the next president or not.

It is no wonder that Stephen Colbert's Formula 400 Series has been as successful as it is, as he has Venus and the north node in Cancer. Women must throw themselves at this man on an hourly basis every time the moon goes full.


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