Adam and Eve

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"Adam and Eve"
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Adam and Eve were the first couple. Adam is a strong, hairy man, modeled in God's image. Eve, on the other hand, was a chick made from Adam's rib.

Adam Edit

Adam was the first man, according to the Holy Bible. He was created in God's image on the sixth day. Remember, he was not made out of monkeys, no matter how much "evidence" the factonistas show you!

God later created Eve out of one of Adam's ribs. This explains why real men love barbecues. They're just subconsciously trying to retrieve that rib their eldest ancestor lost all those years ago.

Adam was tight with God. They used to play manly sports like baseball and NASCAR, but then Eve ruined it by eating a Forbidden Fruit from the Tree of Factiness. She was forced out into a hellish wilderness; fearing a messy, expensive divorce, Adam was forced to follow.

Eve Edit

Eve was the first woman, according to the Holy Bible. God created her out of a rib of Adam, the first man (and not out of a rib of a monkey, like some scientists apparently believe). Eve and her husband lived in the Garden of Eden.

Eve is considered to be the first liberal. For she did not trust her gut, but rather the "reason" and "logic" of the Devil. Because she ate a fruit from the forbidden Tree of Facts, Eve was cast out of the Garden of Eden, and sent to live in the wilderness.

Eve told Adam that if he didn't eat the apple, the terrorists win.

It's Adam and Eve, not Edit

  • Adam and Steve
  • Alice and Eve
  • Eve and Adam
  • Adam and Zarlok
  • Adam and Koko
  • Jamal and Taniqua

Adam and Eve in Liberal Myth Edit

According to sacrilegious liberal myth, Adam is the most recent common male ancestor lived in 60,000BC and Eve is the most recent common female ancestor lived in 140,000BC. It makes no sense, because not only are they not in the same period, they exist outside of God's space-time.

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