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The American Civil Rights Union[1] is a group dedicated to defending all the rights contained in the Constitution.

Not just the one about letting hippies blather on about crap no one else finds necessary, or the one about how criminals don't have to say something during the trial or the one about how criminals can hide things from the police because they don't have a warrant, or whatever.

The ACRU protects all of them, like the one that says you can have a .50-caliber aircraft knocker-downer to kill squirrels[2].


To defend the Constitution at all costs...even if that means aligning themselves with hippies to do it. Man, I hate hippies. The next time they throw a week long music fest, I'm gonna sabotage their concert by driving a tank through the crowd and crank Slayer through their sound system. That'll teach them...

Board of DirectorsEdit

  • former US Attorney General Edwin Meese III
  • Judge Robert H. Bork
  • Dean of the Pepperdine Law School Kenneth W. Starr
  • former Asst. Attorney General for Civil Rights William Bradford Reynolds
  • Professor Walter E. Williams
  • Professor James Q. Wilson
  • Dean Emeritus of the UCLA Anderson School of Business J. Clayburn Laforce, Jr.
  • Hippies

nonpartisan men all.


Current CasesEdit

The people of Washington, D.C. may carry firearms


  1. Not to be confused with the Japanese-American version of the ACLU
  2. Hell, that one's in the Constitution!

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