Born in the dreaded Canadian province of Manitoba, Winnie The Pooh is one of the leading figures in pro-bear propaganda. He is known to wear nothing but a red t-shirt and walk about with his huge, bear schlong hanging out. It is disgusting! (see photo at left)
It is rumored that he is allied with a pig, who controls a small, elite faction of renegede terrorist pigs. Although, his name is unknown and no photo identification has been made.
It is known that Winnie the Pooh has a large "honey jar", which is obviously code for "large salted hydrogen bomb."
He is currently serving hard time in a zoo in Siberia, but has been predicted to be released by sleeper cells in the Bear uprising of 2012.
Life and CareerEdit
Though starting life in Manitoba, Winnie the Pooh moved to England to study under the famous British Socialists that you've probably never heard of, such as H. M. Hyndman and John Maclean. He majored in Dictatorship and Torture Psychology. After that, he moved to East Sussex and began a Stalin-like takeover of everything in the Hundred-Acre Wood. He is currently number three on Parade's "worst non-human dictators" only behind Elmo and Hillary Clinton.
Winnie the Pooh is also a known Satan worshipper. It is known from video evidence that Winnie the Pooh habitually worships Satan while looking into a mirror. This is, perhaps, due to the fact that Satan resides within Winnie the Pooh. This is especially due to the fact that Winnie the Pooh feels better as a result of offering dead mice and yaks blood to Satan. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rf976RupYGw
See Also Edit
- Ice 9
- Polar bears
- Great Bear Incident
- The Left Wing Madness
- Canadian government
|THE WIKIALITY.COM GUIDE TO BEARS|
|Ursa | Winnie The Pooh | Yogi Bear | Colbear | Smokey The Bear|
|Polar bears | Pizzly | Polar Grizzly | Koala | Panda Bear | Bats|
|Vampbear | BearSharks | Bipolar Bear | Care Bears | Roller bear|
|Bear baiting | Bear is driving | Bearism | Great Bear Incident | The Left Wing Madness|