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Army
shows the proper respect America's Military deserves
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ATTENTION: This Page is for Real Americans™ ONLY
If you are not a Real American™, pack your bags and report to GITMO.
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Army
are Truthiness Crusaders!
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Defenders of the free world


The United States Army are the brave troops who protect our country from all that threatens America, democracy, and the baby jesus. Liberals hate the army, and the brave troops that allow them to sleep at night, without being raped by a bear, or blown up by a muslim. And for that liberals are awful, bad people. If liberals had their way, we would have no Army, and other countries could come in freely, and urinate on Lady Liberty.

The U.S. Army is also very protective of its soldiers, especially now that America is ruled by The Greatest President Ever!

In order to insure that the troops enjoy the absolute most secure safety available, The Greatest President Ever has spent countless hours crafting paragraph 11(a) of IAW Change 3, DoD Directive 5122.5:

“Names, video, identifiable written/oral descriptions or identifiable photographs of wounded service members will not be released without the service member’s prior written consent.[1]

But, it doesn't stop there! Patriotic Americans are being called (yet again) to serve their country through their computers!

From the safety of your living room recliner, any Patriotic American can do as much for the war on terror as the soldiers are doing on the front lines!

By following the directives outlined on this page, every American will be doing their part to defeat the terrorists!

Homeland DeploymentEdit

The 3rd Infantry Division’s 1st Brigade Combat Team will be coming home from Iraq to perform specially defined missions in America's heartland heartland:

"to provide command and control for federal homeland defense efforts and coordinate defense support of civil authorities."

America, we should feel luck that our troops are hope and protecting us from the terrorists here, because Obama doesn't want to fight them over there.

The Defense Department see no problems emerging from this redeployment.

While stationed in areas that may see unrest around November 4, 2008, this Patriotic Team of American Troops shall be called "CBRNE[1] Consequence Management Response Force (CCMRF)" nicknamed the “Sea-Smurfs"!

How fun!

See AlsoEdit

What does this hippie know?

FootnotesEdit

  1. "CBRNE" stands for "chemical, biological, radiological, nuclear or high-yield explosive"

External TubesEdit


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