Tom Hanks
has been a guest of The Colbert Report
and got nailed in the process

Tom Hanks
is an insidious part of the
Fancy-pantsification of America!

Stab in the back?
Or slap in the face?
Tom Hanks is one of America's Frenemies.

A Frienemy of Doctor Colbert^{Episode #569}, Hanks does care about the USO.

Early Life & EducationEdit

"Acting" CareerEdit

Tom Hanks began acting as a retard in the Movie "Big", and continued this theme in the movie "Forrest Gump". A sample of Hanks dialogue from Forrest Gump:

FORREST: Hi, Earl! What’s goin’ on?
EARL: Coons are tryin’ to get into school.
FORREST: Coons!? Well, raccoons try to get on our back porch, Momma just chase ’em off with a broom.
EARL: Not raccoons, you idiot, niggers. And, they want to go to school with us.
FORREST: (with much surprise) With us? They do?

Like Nicholas Cage, Tom Hank's has put his acting career on an infinate hold to showcase his seemingly unnatural ability to solve hundred/thousand year old mysteries.

Confusion About ReligionEdit

Meeting StephenEdit

See AlsoEdit

• Operation Iraqi Stephen: Going Commando

Tom Hanks
needs to be Colbertized
Please watch and take notes from
the correct episode of The Colbert Report to get it right!