Shelves of Honor

From Wikiality, the Truthiness Encyclopedia

"Oh, hi! I didn't see you there." The Shelves of Honor are a featured area of The Eagle's Nest, where Stephen places items that serve as reminders of wonderfully American times. At the end of some episodes, Dr. Colbert places an object on one of his bookshelves to commemorate an especially noteworthy event.

Viewers are encouraged to create a similar shrine in their homes or places of business to immortalize Dr. Colbert.

Contents 1 Items on The Shelves of Honor 1.1 Bookshelf Of Broken Dreams 1.2 Books 1.3 Special Items 2 References

[edit] Items on The Shelves of Honor

ΤΓΡ fraternity paddle Chewbacca action figure Credit Card Application (replaced the Constitution) Stephen Colbert pumpkin Rock and Roll nativity scene Cardboard Box Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots Chocolate portrait of Viggo Mortensen (eBay Item# 4791736422) The Omnisport Award for excellence in everything Various items in need of Tax Exemption[1] Video iPod Ski boots and plane tickets Boat motor Silicone breast implant (removed) Piggy bank Dreamsicle DVDs of Road House and Next of Kin[2] Scale model of a Saturn V moon rocket The last telegram he ever received Stephen Colbert's DNA Polyhedral dice

A carton of Narlboro cigarettes (much cheaper than Marlboros) Middle third of a birthday cake Punch cards of the first spam E-mail message An honorary doctorate degree from Knox College, accompanied by photographs of Dr. Noah Drake, Dr. Gregory House, and Dr. Cliff Huxtable A "Biggie" sized cup from Wendy's A large collection of Cliff's Notes An issue of Highlights for Children Photograph of Michael Jordan dunking Photograph of Buck O'Neil A jar full of lemons Microwave oven stolen from The O'Reilly Factor green room with a melted Al Franken action figure on its glass turntable Captain America's indestructible shield of Wakandan vibranium Stephen's favorite childhood toy, Captain Lead, a 40 pound bar of lead. Mouldering stovepipe hat An egg inside a milk bottle, to honor the passing of Mr. Wizard (placed between Dr. Colbert's honorary doctorate and a scale model of the Ten Commandments tablets)

[edit] Bookshelf Of Broken Dreams

One of the shelves is reserved for mementos of Supreme Court hopefuls who faded into the night.

• A portrait of Abe Fortas
• A portrait of Douglas Ginsberg
• A portrait of Robert Bork
• A portrait of Harriet Miers

[edit] Books

The many books on the Shelves are divided into "fiction" and "non-fiction" sections. Watership Down and the Bible are just some of the tomes in the "non-fiction" section, while Tom Clancy's Debt of Honor and Red Rabbit along with On the Origin of Species and Sexual Behavior in the Human Female and many others are in the "fiction" section. A copy of Elie Wiesel's Night is duct-taped between the fiction and non-fiction sections.

[edit] Special Items

• Colbert also raised his Saginaw Spirit # 1 jersey^{Episode #277} to the rafters of his TV studio, as he was undefeated and on top of his game, in a ceremony celebrating all he had given to the great sport of hockey.

• an extremely valuable edition of Amazing Spiderman comic # 573 signed by both Dr. Colbert and Joe Quesada^{Episode #479} as bait to induce Barack Obama to visit.

• Dr. Colbert symbolically retired the boiling frog metaphor at the end of The Greatest Administration Ever (January 19, 2009) by placing the skeletal remains of the frog that he had been boiling since the administration began on the shelf^{Episode #500}

[edit] References

1. ↑ These items were only on camera a few moments to allow Colbert to count them as tax-deductible work expenses; they were then removed from the shelf.
2. ↑ He rented these DVDs but never returned them. He promptly removed both after being reminded by himself that he would forget them if he left them there.