The Colbert Report/Episodes/EpGuide/Episode 315

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[edit] Production Info

Previous Episode

Date:
September 27, 2007

Season:

Episode:
315

Production code:
3122

Next Episode

[edit] The Check-In

Dr. Colbert promotes his book, I Am America. (And So Can You!) with a special offer for the heroes who order online in advance of the official release date, October 9, 2007.

[edit] Intro

Dartmouthing Off

"The Democrats face off at Dartmouth. I can't wait to see who got tasered."

Schipped Beef

"Then, Congress passes a bill that would give health care to poor kids. Don't we already have the Flintstone's Vitamins Program?"

Schwartz and Egger

"And film historian David Schwartz is here to talk about presidential campaign ads. My name is Stephen Colbert and I approve this guest."

The answer to tonight's sudoku is 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, not necessarily in that order.
This is The Colbert Report.

~ Stephen Colbert

September 27, 2007 The Colbert Report

[edit] News Out of Ancient Egypt

King Tut Was Not Black
- King Tut was not black or white, he was gold
- Dr. Colbert does not see race; he does see currency
- Dr. Colbert gives his I Have A Gold Dream speech
  - he usually wakes up with an obelisk

[edit] Democrat Debate

at Dartmouth, Dr. Colbert's alma mater
- Stephen's graffiti (Fartmouth is copyrighted by Stephen)
Tim Russert pwned Hillary
- she goes home and discusses torture with Bill as pillow talk or foreplay
  - Geneva Conventions is a safe word