Surrendery

From Wikiality, the Truthiness Encyclopedia

From the French "Soirren d'rei", meaning "Holy shit, here come the (insert name of invader here)!" Surrendery is the natural mental state of the vast majority of the residents of France. 18th Century ruler Napoleon Bonaparte surrendered his way all the way to Waterloo before surrendering in even more spectacular fashion to the English; falling into the English Channel and floating to the island of Saint Helena, where he opened a truffle shop and died a wealthy man 18 years later. Surrendery is very similar to the modern Democrat tactic of Cut and run. This sort of blatant disregard for courage is exactly why real Americans hate the French. And Democrats.

Contents 1 Noteable French Surrenders 2 Quotes 3 Trivia 4 See Also

[edit] Noteable French Surrenders

• World Wars I and II
• The Hundred Years War (several times)
• The French Revolution
• The Boer War
• Vietnam
• Indochine
• The Battle of Algiers
• The Franco-Prussian War
• French and Indian War
• The French-Canadian War
• The French-American War
• The 2005 Riots

[edit] Quotes

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me."

~ General George S. Patton

[edit] Trivia

Why are the streets of Paris lined with trees?
So the German Army can march in the shade.

How do you defend Paris?
No one knows, it's never been tried.

Why are used French rifles so valuable?
They've never been fired, and only dropped once.

Did you know French Tanks have five gears?
Four in reverse and one in forward, in case the enemy attacks from behind.

How did the French react to German reunification?
They put up speed bumps at the borders to slow down the Panzers.

How many Frenchmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, They give up and wait for someone else to do it for them.

What do you call a Frenchman with a sunburn?
Fried chicken.

How to you get France to surrender?
Declare War

What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up?
The Army.

[edit] See Also

• Deporty
• Stephen Colbert, because France is so depressing, the link may actually save you from slitting your wrists
• French people
• Bastille Day
• I'm Feeling Lucky for "French Military Victories" on Google.
• French military victories and defeats. - However, you should know that for the French, "Victory" means "Defeat", "Draw" means "Defeat", and "Defeat" means "Holy shit we got fucked up".