Strom Thurmond
is a Beautiful Republican
God Bless America

Despite what you may have heard
Strom Thurmond
Is totally not racist!

Did you know... • Even after death, Thurmond remains the senator of South Carolina. • Held the post of Hatemonger-In-Chief from December 24, 1954 to his death. Succeeded by Jesse Helms • Dick "Shooter" Cheney's plane is named after Strom's holy ghost[1]

Strom Thurmond was a great leader, civil rights hero, and Senator of South Carolina. After his death, Strom gave birth to a 78-year-old-mixed-race-woman. His family was quoted as saying "As J. Strom Thurmond has passed away and cannot speak for himself, the Thurmond family acknowledges Ms. Essie Mae Washington- Williams' claim to her heritage." Because Thurmond loved The Baby Jesus so much, he was able to live to the ripe ol' age of 162, becoming the oldest living man in the world.

Strom QuotesEdit

• "Our niggers is better off than most anybody's niggers, why, they got washing machines and some of'um even got televisions. I can't understand why they complaining."

• "I want to tell you that there's not enough troops in the army to force the southern people to break down segregation and admit the Nigger race into our theaters, into our swimming pools, into our homes, and into our churches"

• On finding that Governor William H. Hastie of the Virgin Islands was black after he had invited him to visit Columbia, he said "I would not have written him if I knew he was a Negro. Of course, it would have been ridiculous to invite him."

• "Straddling the fence will only make your ass hurt."

• "Niggers."

• "It ain't rape when one of y'all's property."

See AlsoEdit

• Adolf Hitler
• Chairman Mao
• Josef Stalin
• Vladimir Lenin
• The Spirit of Strom Thurmond

ReferencesEdit

1. ↑

Hey Ma!
Pack your banjo and chewin' t'backer, we fixin' to enjoy us some
Strom Thurmond

HIDE THE WATERMELONS!!!
Strom Thurmond
IS ONE HORNY BASTARD.

Strom Thurmond
Was an Enemy of Satan and a Pinnacle of Freedom here on earth.
Sadly, Strom Thurmond has moved to The Baby Jesus's Secret Island Home
in Heaven to continue the fight by his side. Be scared Satan!