Stephen Colbert's Crotch is like the sun: You should never look directly at it. Unlike the sun, Stephen Colbert's crotch will not blind you. It will bring you to tears and, in some cases, cure cancer.
Stephen Colbert's crotch is the eighth wonder of the world. The other seven wonders suck balls ... Stephen's balls.
President Bush has proposed that the best way to end the Iraq War is to fill fighter planes with photographs of Stephen's crotch and drop them all over Iraq. The Iraqi people will realize the error of their ways, because Stephen's crotch causes all who see it to become American patriots.