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Samurai

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Samurais are like these guys. They have swords and they're all "Whoosh, whoosh, kerblam! What's up now round-eye? I just relieved you of your limbs is what's up. Sayonara sucka'!" Samurais are a tricky subject, as they are not easily known to be associated with any political disposition. Given they are so bad-ass however, it can be easily extrapolated that they are in fact, Asian friends to the republican party, possess street-cred, and are down with the Jesus posse.

Indisputable samurai canonEdit

Samurais typically travel in groups of 4-5 and have giant robots at their disposal to fight oversized monsters (See Hilary Clinton's calves, Michael Moore's waist, etc.). These robots, in their initial form, are beaten 100% of the time. It is only when they combine themselves into one combined entity they become unstoppable- so unstoppable by comparison, their unstop ability could be compared to the well-known, garden-variety unstop ability of which members of the democratic party would burn the American flag to fuel the fire under their cauldrons and practice satanic rituals while smearing feces on The Holy Bible—that is, were they in a situation where no one would be capable of stopping them from doing that.

We are so screwedEdit

Sadly, there are no more samurai's except for Tom Cruise. He is the last samurai. There can never be any more samurais because Tom Cruise is gay and therefore incapable of having procreative intercourse with a woman. I suppose he could adopt a little gay foreign baby like celebrities do and bestow his samurai secrets onto it, but it'd probably be like black or something. I mean not that there's anything wrong with that.

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