Roland Burris
From Wikiality, the Truthiness Encyclopedia
Roland "Don't Lynch Me" Burris is Milorad Blagojevich's Black Friend and Jr. Senator of Illinois. At first, racist Democrats wouldn't let him take a seat, but eventually racist Democrats used him as a token. Ultimately, Mr. Burris chose to spend more time with his family.
Mr. Burris is also a known practitioner of truthiness and follows his gut[1] no matter what, rather than the liberal bias that is facts. We salute you sir, we need more people like you!
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[edit] Mr. Burris Goes To Washington
Mr. Blowjobbitch wanted to follow the teachings of Mavericktheism, despite what racist democrats expressed. Blagojobiatch and Burris agreed that the democratic congress was 'overly' whitey, plus this would stick them up after their constant demand for affirmative action, how do you like it now biatches! and they perceived it to be very unjust by not practicing affirmative action properly. According with Mr. Burris, the racist democrats are just jealous of him and of his incredible and greatest accomplishments to humanity over the years. Some have accused Mr. Burris of being a megalomaniac-narcissistic-psychotic-power-hungry bastard; but in my opinion the guy is overly modest and his acomplishment should be recognized by allowing him to take the Illinois' seat. Besides this will be a great opportunity to destroy the democratic party from the inside out so the GOP can take power while they are not looking.
Mr. Burris cannot wait to start cleaning up the racist democratic congress by booting the racists out of town. We salute you sir, and hope you get ALL racist senators those democratic racists out of America!
- Update: Those racist democrat bastards have decided to sit Roland Burris. The Racist un-american bear-loving hippies democrats have decided that by seating a black man they can keep him for themselves to make them look good, while making the republican senators look like a "whiteys club"...!
Shame on you racist democrats! Your Racist Affirmative Action wont work!
[edit] Qualifications to be senator
According with Roland Burris, the democratic congress are a bunch of whitey racist and they need to have a black man to bring valance to the senate. Not only that, he is clearly overly qualified, the man has even chiseled his achievements on stone!
Roland Burris Greatest Acomplisments:
- Conquered the Wild West
- Became Illinois SUPER attorney General
- Was President of the SUPER cool crowd
- Won the National Championship with the "Trailblazers"
- Is Greater than Alexander the Great by kicking his ass!
The first to Purchased the Senate Seat of President-Elect Obama from the Governor of IllinoisBecame Illinois First Black Senator
Became America's First Black PresidentThe New Overlord and Master of the GalazyThe Greatest Gift to Mankind
There is no truth that Mr. Roland Burris is compensating for anything... or everything.
[edit] Life On The Senate
Nation, sadly we were informed that Mr. Burris may want to spend more time with his family. What a bad timing... as one democrat put it, "He is in deep sh#t!" "We shall miss him"
