Reza Aslan

From Wikiality, the Truthiness Encyclopedia

[edit] About the living bomb that is, Reza Aslan

Reza Aslan (Squiggly:رضا اصلان) was born in Tehran in 1972, and is now an American-Iranian journalist, writer, religious scholar, and gigantic faggot. Best known for his book, "No god but God," it is public knowledge that Aslan is the reason why angels fall from the skies, puppies die, and bears continue living and reproducing. Ipso facto; Reza Aslan propagates bear-reproduction.

It is certain that Aslan's fellow terrorist chums were watching on April 17th, 2006, when cherubic and stunning Stephen Colbert smote Aslan's commie, lets-blame-America bullshat ass.

[edit] Why Reza Aslan has never been shot at

Many ask why, with this leftist resume, how Aslan can continue his life, unscathed by the Threat Down, or even being put On Notice. The reason for this is obvious.

Reza Aslan is a babe.

With thick, wavy hair that just screams for someone to run their fingers through, his dark eyes beckon us towards him. He, the ruggedly handsome stable boy, me, the naive young girl visiting her aunt from England. This man - he is so different, and yet...he'd teach me about love, and I would teach him about passion. He stops shoveling hay when he notices me at the door of the stable. He drops the rake as his body glistens with the alluring mixture of sweat and desire. He parts his full lips seductively and lets out...

"What makes this country so unique is that we are almost entirely a nation of immigrants. We have ingrained in us this desire for pluralism, this knowledge for other cultures. But we also have this isolationism and this notion that what we have is fine the way it is and we do not want anything to change."

And that is the real reason why Osama Bin Laden is still out there.

[edit] Factoids concerning Iran's Brad Pitt

• Mr. Aslan is not a lion. We find that hugely disappointing.