Raccoons
From Wikiality, the Truthiness Encyclopedia
Raccoons 
Raccoons pretending to be British. | |
|---|---|
| Photos: | Provided by: The Raccoon Gallery |
| Shorthand for: | Black people (This is a misconception, despite the similarities between the two.) |
This article will rip off the mask of lies and expose the truth behind these short bears!
[edit] Kin to Bears? Well They Do Steal
Like Bears, raccoons have a sweet tooth, as noted in the below picture.They also are thought to be gay but this has not been proven. They will steal anything, mostly attracted to bright shiny objects like tin foil, coins and chromed out vehicles. However, sweets deter raccoons from stealing your freshly pimped out ride
Raccoons come from Raccoon city, which is a really real city and NOT Toronto
[edit] Raccoons on Parole
Some raccoons are released early on parole. Many go back into raccoon civilization only to repeat the same crime and return to prison.
  This horrid beast will spend eternity wandering the vitriolous wastelands of Utah. | ||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
