Owls
From Wikiality, the Truthiness Encyclopedia
Owls are a waste of time. And as such, so is this article. However, another form of owl called the bowel (Bearlister Crowley) is a sworn enemy of Stephen Colbert. Owls are dead to Stephen because the bowel ate all of them.
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| Owls | |
| General Information | |
| Average Lifespan: | 1 year to 50 years |
|---|---|
| Average Height: | 1/5 linear hectare |
| Average Wingspan: | none of your business |
| Estimated Population | |
| In The Wild: | a billion |
| In Captivity: | 5 |
| In Wizard Schools: | 53 |
Contents |
[edit] Breeds Of Owls
[edit] Owl Parts
[edit] Tail
[edit] Beak
[edit] Wings
[edit] Swiveling Heads
[edit] Freakish Eyes
[edit] Invisible Ears
[edit] Owl's Place On The Foodchain
[edit] What Owls Eat
chicken wings
"Little People"
cookies
[edit] What Eats Owls
elephants
[edit] Habitat
[edit] Natural
they live in lavish, 30 room mansions
[edit] Zoos
Owls cannot live in zoos because they eat chickens and elephants eat them. With exception to zoos that have neither chickens, nor elephants.
[edit] In Schools
[edit] Politics
[edit] As Mascot For Elitists
[edit] Battle With The Logging Industry
[edit] Uses For Owls
they deliver messages
they are friends of sea turtles
they eat mice
[edit] See Also
  This horrid beast will spend eternity wandering the vitriolous wastelands of Utah. | ||||||||||
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