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On Notice

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On Notice
is a featured segment of
the Greatest American Television Show--EVER!!!, The Colbert Report.


Colbert20060802StephenBrainDiagram
How On Notice fits in Stephen's brain.
Pro-LickAdded by Pro-Lick
On Notice is the second stage after being called out and it gives you time to clean up your act before you are "Dead to Me".

According to Stephen, once you are put on notice you will receive a summons to appear on the show. If you do you not appear and apologize for your transgression(s) within 60 days, you will be moved to the "Dead to Me" board.

Announced As On Notice Prior To The On Notice Board's UnveilingEdit

Officially On NoticeEdit

ON NOTICE

DISTRACTIONS

JANE FONDA (FANTASIES)

YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE

LIMEY SQUIRREL EATERS

GRIZZLY BEARS

FORGIVENESS

JOURNAL OF PALEOLIMNOLOGY

MICHAEL ADAMS

MIKE HUCKABEE

BARBRA STREISAND


Flavor Crystals
DENNIS KUCINICH


Next on Notice

Forgiven

Should DeVos, Romney, and Barbour Be On Notice??Edit

At the Saginaw Spirit game on November 3, 2006, Michigan gubernatorial candidate Dick DeVos dropped the ceremonial puck before the game. Along with him was Mississippi Governor Hayley Barbour and Taxachusetts Governor Mitt Romney. Normally, these ceremonial puck drops are ho hum, they drop the puck, and that is it.

However, DeVos, Romney, and Barbour were all wearing Saginaw Spirit jerseys bearing their names and the number one. That is Stephen's number! He retired it! He raised it to the rafters! That number is his! It doesn't belong to anyone else!

Should DeVos, Romney, and Barbour be put on notice for wearing Stephen's #1? Does anyone from the show know about this? Perhaps they will read it here and find out about what has happened.

Being Put On NoticeEdit

It was believed by a stupid audience member that being put On Notice was a simple process of writing a topic Stephen was angry at on to a plastic card & then adding this card to the On Notice board. But in the August 2nd, 2006 airing of episode 130, Stephen outlines the difficult process by which On Notice cards (ONCs) are made; including the activation of Stephen's gut, the recently relocated On Notice Card Factory (ONCF) from Bangor, Maine to Bangalore, India & the transportation of the ONCs via truck, boat, train & eagle (in that order).

FactoidsEdit

  • Defective On Notice cards are used as a cheap source of housing & a high-fiber snack.


Stewart-on-notice
Dr. Colbert visits Daily Show to put Stewart On Notice
Sea robAdded by Sea rob

Off NoticeEdit

When you are taken "Off Notice" you will receive a basket of assorted fruits and a bottle of Stephen Colbert's designer fragrance, Scorn.

Jon Stewart was originally slated to be placed "On Notice" but was first "Called Out". He was officially placed On Notice on August 10, 2006, and then taken "Off Notice" on August 14, 2006 when he was officially "Called out".

Mort Zuckerman was placed On Notice on the June 12, 2006 edition of The Colbert Report but was removed after apologizing for his transgressions on the July 12, 2006 broadcast. Interestingly, in order to make space for Zuckerman on the On Notice board, Stephen gave The Sea a reprieve. We must assume, therefore, that The Sea has returned to Called Out status.

In some cases, being taken "Off Notice" may lead to a more severe judgement. For example, New York Intellectuals were taken off the On Notice board and placed on the Dead to Me board on November 16, 2005.

See AlsoEdit

External SourcesEdit

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