Nova Scotia
From Wikiality, the Truthiness Encyclopedia
Nova Scotia
| |
|---|---|
| Capitol: | "town" |
| Official Flower: | papiloma virus |
| Official Language: | Gaelic |
| Official Animal: | the last cod, circa 1986 |
| Official Beer: | all beer is official if you know your place, boy |
| Motto: | We had a ship and it went really fast |
| Nickname: | Maine's Mexico |
| Population: | 2,000,000,000 |
| Standard MPH: | 80 while drinking screech |
| Principal imports: | The Prime Minister's cocaine |
| Principal exports: | gold, diamonds, rocketships |
| Principal industries: | Burtles |
| Fun Fact #1: | Dalhousie University funded by the spoils of looting the White House in 1812 |
| Fun Fact #2: | Bay of Fundy tides are controlled by Dr. Stephen Colbert's mind |
Nova Scotia is a place where turtles breed with bears in honeycombs to make a new breed of hard shelled animal, the "Burtle"
Nova Scotia is the best province in Canada because of the Burtles.
Near 2 billion people live in this great Burtle producing paradise where our main exports are gold, diamonds and rocketships, while our main import is the Prime minister's cocaine.
It is also NOT the love nest of Condoleeza Rice and Peter McKay. That location is classified as a matter of national security. Why do you need to know? That's right, you don't.
Contents |
[edit] History Of Nova Scotia
[edit] Nova Scotia Today
[edit] Acadians
Acadians are aMi'kmaq and French mix after the Orgies of 1752 and are the founders of Nova Scotia which is why its exports are so valuble. Stephen Colbert originally gave them Nova Scotia as a bit of land to start them off they have taken off and have established a great Burtle producing province.
[edit] Diplomatic Relationship With America
[edit] Nova Scotia's message from Americans
Nova Scotia, you had your chance to become a state. You could have joined the thirteen colonies in forming the United States of America. But you didn't. Now look how things have changed; you are part of Canada, while America has become the most powerful country in the history of the world.
We don't want you now. Suck it, Nova Scotia.
[edit] Nova Scotia's message to Americans
Free health care.
[edit] America's reply message
We attack at dawn.
[edit] Landmarks In Nova Scotia
[edit] Famous People From Nova Scotia
[edit] A Typical Day In Nova Scotia
You wake up to the beautiful war crys of a Burtle at around 4:00am, as they prepare to hunt for their next victim. At precisely 6:17am you will have a breakfast of noodles with a side of Tartar Sauce, don't fret, you have a side beverage of unskimmed milk. After you have finished your delectable meal you go outside, rain or shine, (or was we say, SNOW OR HAIL.) to prepare for a long day of chores. Some of the chores consist of Watering the Grass, Feeding the Trees, Throwing Fresh Meat to the Burtles, Massaging The 'Older Folk' in Your Community ect.. After a long day of work, with no lunch breaks, you go home to a nice warm meal of giblets, watermellon and grape drink. To help you get to sleep at exactly 8:34pm, the wild burtles will sing a ceremonious song, about eggs and snausage.
[edit] Strange Laws in Nova Scotia
It is illegal to water your grass while it is raining. You cannot have more then 47 Burtles in your yard at one time, chuck norris will be forced to visit you and maul your leg hair. Insted of singing O Canada you must sing R Kellys song, Bump N Grind, every morning
