Ninjas

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I kill what I fear and I fear what I don't understand, and I don't understand this.
Be less random and more truthy--use your gut.
Hello, Ninjas
Asian and very good at math.


Ninjas
is a Beautiful Republican
God Bless America
The majestic ninja in his natural habitat...

Ninjas are a group of Asians who try to mimic the sweet moves of Dr. Stephen Colbert. Originally, they were trained by Bears to fight against Stephen Colbert during World War II. The resulting combat became known as the atomic bomb. After their sound defeat, the ninjas decided to look to Colbert as their mentor. He taught them the sacred martial arts, one of the greatest defenses against Freedom Haters.

In no way is this contrary to the teachings of Christ.
Ninja's on Parade


Some fun facts about ninjas:

  • Chuck Norris is NOT a ninja.
  • Michael Jackson is NOT a ninja, but wishes he could pretend to be one one with his kiddy playmates.
  • Ninjas can run up to 75 miles per hour.... ON THEIR FEET!
  • A ninja can live in your house days, maybe even months without your knowledge.
  • Scorpion is a ninja. Probably the greatest ninja ever to be concieved
  • The Characters on Dragon Ball Z are NOT ninjas

It is a commonly known fact that Ninjas, in all their stealthynessness, are far superior to Pirates. Many people will try to convince you that Pirates are better, but its all a communist lie. Pirates wish to undermine America. In fact, Ninjas are here to stop Pirates from their evil onslaught against America. Left unchecked, Pirates will steal our tube socks, our internets, and our planet, which goes against God's plan.

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