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Former Speaker of the House and once-potential POTUS candidate in 2008, Newt 'Moon base' [1] Gingrich is trying for the presidency again in 2012 and is known for his way with the ladies.

Contents 1 Biography 2 Contract On America 3 Factoids 4 Newt's New Contract With America 5 See Also 6 External Tubes

BiographyEdit

The victim of a witches curse young Newt was once turned into a slimy amphibian. He did get better but is still not fully human.

As an adult was forced to divorce his third wife because she was inconsiderate enough to get cancer while he was busy having a career and a hot girlfriend. What a bitch. In no way should he be compared to Clinton[2]

In March 2007, during a radio interview with Focus on the Family's James Dobson, Gingrich admitted that he had carried on an extramarital affair during the time he was hounding Bill Clinton for his own infidelities. This is not the essence of hypocrisy, it is the essence of courage.

He did not run for the Presidency, even though he is the best adulterer the Republicans have.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1gyRnwtscPA

Contract On AmericaEdit

Factoids Edit

• Wants to do away with freedom of speech on the internets, as it only helps the terrorists, and his vision for America includes no rights for terrorists. Only liberals hate America.
• He has a half brother that keeps calling himself a lesbian. There's no way that thing can't pee while standng.
• His no fan of the Bill of Rights, except for The Second Amendment, Jesus's favorite amendment

• Hates Food Stamps, like all Real Americans should do.
• He is a certified historian
• He is know as not just an idea man but a revoliutionary with radical ideas in fact many believe him to be the reincarnation of The Jesus

  

• He is not rich.

Newt's New Contract With AmericaEdit

• Abolish The Libural Census
• Shut Down the Libural Governmant
• Offer free market spam

See AlsoEdit

• Dr. Frank Luntz

External TubesEdit

• Newt's Plans for America!
• Newt Gingrich: A Real American Hero!
• Newt Has a Heart! He Cares about the Sick People!
• Gingrich loves porn! small businesses
• Newt Gingrich embraces the Gospel of Wealth
• Newt Exposes Acorn
• Newt to award another small community business
• Newt Gingrich Wins "Family Values Porn Fan of The Year"
• Shocking News: Newt is actually a liberal!!!
• Newt Gingrich for 2012!
• Gingrich demands the end of terrorism
• The Civil Rights have bankrupted and corrupted America
• Newt demands Democrats to apologize for the Rise of Rightwing Extremism Socialism
• Newt to negotiate peace with racists NAACP
• Newt continues to defend family values
• How to save America. We must become China
• Feminazi decries sanctity of marriage
• The Gospel of Newt
• Like always, liburals hate Gingrich
• Newt support outlawing Food Stamps: Those that dont work dont eat, bitch
• Newt refuses to learn libural math
• un-american traitor meets with fureigners to subvert America
• Gingrich uses magic to produce supporters
• Newt Gingrich's campaign takes radical move. Radical!
• Even democrats love Newt Gingrich!
• Newt Gingrich wins $1,000,000 in debt
• Gingrich wins free travel points!
• Newt Gingrich conquers Twitter
• Newt Gingrich to spend more time with family in trailer park
• Newt Gingrich, the fat power ranger.
• Newt Ginrich will save America by sleeping with more women
• Newt Gingrich is secretly Brad Pitt!

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