Best known for its size and outreach, Landover was one of the first churches in America to have a website and to reverse 90 years of "progressive" thought in America. It is the only heaven-bound Protestant church.
- Mrs. Betty Bowers
- Pastor Deacon Fred Smith
Bringing Integrity to Christian HomemakersEdit
Baptists Are Saving HomosexualsEdit
Who Jesus Will DamnEdit
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
What Landover Thinks about the JoosEdit
- Trade Us Your Voter's Registration Card For Free Fried Chicken From Popeye's! (for African-Americans only)
Prayer To Save An AtheistEdit
I know that I'm a worthless, worthless and a constant source of irritation to You. Thank You for not killing me today and flinging my limp corpse into the flames of the sadistic hell You created.
As a True Christian(tm), I love You with all my heart, convenience permitting.
And am only glad that Your nasty temper was not turned on me today.
Lord Jesus, I know that Your love is unconditional: All you ask is that I do everything that You demand and flatter You regularly without shame or regard to the mess You make of everything You try to create.
Lord Jesus, even though You made some noise about giving away all our possessions away to the poor, please guide Our Republican party to affect that which You most desire: tax cuts for folks rich enough to tithe!
In this I pray Your humble servant, oh, and Jesus, while I still have You, I really want me one of those Lexus two-door sedans.