Tree Huggers
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Introduction
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Tree Huggers are a strange race of sub-humans related to Hippies, Commies, and the Liberal. The current belief is that we need to enslave this sub-human abomination to serve our every whim and sterilize them so that they cannot breed with our current population.
History
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No one really knows where the Tree Huggers came from, although many believe they originated from the unholy spawn of Hillary Clinton and Satan. Most Tree Huggers are either feminists or homosexuals. The resulting inability to breed has led them to communism. The ones that can breed usually have retarded fish/monkey children. The sightings of these abominations are usually attributed to Bigfoot sightings.
How to Spot a Tree Hugger
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- Most said to have acoustic guitars or bongo drums.
- Hairy arm pits and\or legs (sometimes braided)
- Tie-dyes
- Jam Bands such as Dave Matthews, The Grateful Dead, and Phish
- They smell of sulfer and marijuana smoke
- Patchouli Oil stench wafting from their backpacks filled with hallucinogenic mushrooms and LSD.
- They are your 11th Grade English Teacher, likes the "Horned Frogs", and eats bird seed.
See Also
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