Dr. Michael Novacek
has been a guest of The Colbert Report
and got nailed in the process

Dr. Michael Novacek studies science-related stuff,
guaranteeing him a one-way ticket straight to hell.

Dr. Michael Novacek
makes The Baby Jesus sad.
Does your mother know you read these filthy liberal myths?

"Dr." Michael Novacek is a book-writing, science-learning, hater of The Baby Jesus.

He wrote a book about digging up bones, which sounds kind of gay.

He was a guest on The Colbert Report on November 14, 2006, despite Stephen's concerns that he was too scared to get nailed.

Which he probably was, anyway.