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Cornholed

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EtymologyEdit

The verb "cornholed" is derived from the last name of America's lost founding father, Robert Cornhole.

v - To commit an image to a cornhole board.

Meaning during the Colonial EraEdit

The phrase Cornholed came into use after the first continental congress. Robert Cornhole was so drunk and snored so loudly that most delegates wanted him thrown out. He bitterly resisted this and was able to stay in the congress. Citizens of Philadelphia used the term cornholed to mean that one was heavily resisting from being thrown out of some sort of institution, meeting, etc.

Example sentence in colonial Philadelpia: "I vomited on the bartender in Tommy's Tavern but I was allowed to stay after I cornholed the bartender."

Meaning during Contemporary TimesEdit

The advocates of cornholism, or cornholists, believe that someone is worthy of being cornholed or worthy of being called cornholed if he is beautiful, manly, gutteral and heroic in the enterprise of truth. Morevover, at present most cornholists believe that only Stephen Colbert can be called cornholy or be spoken of as being, having been or fit to be cornholed. However other men such as Joseph Smith, Sean Hannity, Mitt Romney, Glenn Beck, Pat Robertson and even Rush Limbaugh can be said to have been cornholed before and thereby to be cornholy but cornhole scripture forbids cornholists from calling anyone but Stephen Colbert or Glenn Beck potential cornholers. Jesus, it is believed, was American and a cornholer but pre-cornholy seeing as Robert Cornhole was yet to inspire the cornhole of cornholes in men.

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