The Census
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 And it came to pass in those days that a decree went out from Caesar Obamanus that all the world should be registered. This census first took place while Frankinus was governing Minnesotania. So all went to be registered, everyone to his own city.
Joseph also went up from Galilee-Texas, out of the city of Houston-Nazareth, into New Judea, to the city of David, which is called Bethlehem DC, because he was of the house and lineage of David, to be registered with Mary, his betrothed wife, who was with Child. But lo, the evil agents of ACORN came, and asked nosy questions about the nature of their relationship, and told the concierge about the "virgin," and suddenly, verily, there was no room at the inn. And Glenn Beck wept. |
| ~ The Holy Bible, Michelenus Bachmannian: 13:666 |
The US Census (aka The Nuremberg Laws) is a frightening tabulation of all American citizens to determine who is worthy of the Socialist Paradise and who isn't. It has been generally used by genealogy nerds, mathematician geeks, and statistician dorks for over 50 years to determine the future of Liberal America.
Contents |
The History of the US Census
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The US Census began in 1785 after the first publication of Poor Richard's Almanac stated that there were 345 people in the country. Various influential people in the government felt that this number simply had to be wrong, and a Presidential Proclamation was sent out asking everyone in the country to come to Philadelphia to be counted on September 2, 1786. Unfortunately the politicians overlooked the fact that this date fell right smack dab in the middle of fall harvest, and when only 43 people, including 21 women and four babies, showed up at the appointed time, it became obvious that another method of counting the population had to be implemented.
In April, 1788, a new army of census takers (made up mostly of slaves and physically handicapped persons) was drafted to venture into the wilderness in all directions, counting and making records as they went. The government's failure to issue paper, pens or pencils to these workers (50% of whom were illiterate anyway) hampered early efforts, as did the public's tendency - which exists to this day - to lie to these workers and/or give them directions so they would wander into a swamp or step over a cliff.
By 1801, however, current system of census-taking was in place and was functioning at an acceptable level, despite the continued tendency of census takers to disappear. The best theory at the time was that they were being conscripted to fight foreign wars.
The Census under the Roosevelt AdministrationEdit
The Internment of un-AmericansEdit
The Census under the Obama AdministrationEdit
The Future Internment of Real Americans!!Edit
External TubesEdit
- Real American Hero calls for dissension
- Census? What the hell is that?
- The Dark Truth about the US Census
- How the US Census can be used for the internment of
Real Americans"undesirables" and foreigners - GOP supports crusade against US Census
- More evidence that the Census is an evil plot to take America!
- Bachmann introduces bill to outlaw census!
- Liberal Census continues to spread libural lies!
- Evil Census man captured! Real American Heroes apply America's Justice on evil man!
- Bachmann on the capture of evil census man
- US Census to be in spanish now!!!
- Evil Census continues to terrify community
- GOP to send their own version of census: will contain 10% more Jesus and 25% more Reagan
- US Census worker arrested for faking death: ruled suicide
- Census worker kills himself then dumps evidence
- Census destroys Nation
- un-american traitors demand The Census
- libural census continues to cause chaos
- war against libural census continues
- Libural Census continues attacks
- Census criminal arrested
- Texas 100% Census free!
