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ATTENTION: This Page is for Real Americans™ ONLY
If you are not a Real American™, pack your bags and report to GITMO.
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Burger King
has been granted full United States "citizenship"
for their donation to Republican causes.
America thanks you, Burger King
Burgerkingvsjack

BK, before he was The King. He used to be bullied by Jack in the Box in High School. WHO'S YOUR KING NOW?!

The Burger King is the arch enemy of Ronald McDonald and also the favorite fast food restaurant of Stephen Colbert. The King is represented by agent Drew Rosenhaus, plays defensive back and wide receiver in the National Football League, and has three video games with him in it.

ChildhoodEdit

The Burger King was the first American monarch. He was never a prince, but did partake in royal military regalia with the great Colonel Sanders . His spent most of his childhood playing with his now ex-friend, Ronald Leeroy McDonald. He attended Illnois Elementary, getting mostly B's, and C's on Art and Math. His high school days were much worse, though, and he spirraled into depression and drugs. He eventually dropped out, and set off to make his own pyjama company. It failed miserably, and unable to financially support him anymore, The Burger King's parents cast him out.

Adulthood and working lifeEdit

Burger king brooke

The King with his Hot Super Model Girlfriend. It’s good to be King...

Unable to find any sustainable income, The B.K looked for the help of his old friend, Ronald McDonald, who was then establishing YummyPlace, an ill-fated resturant. He was accepted, and helped create McDonald's dream. The resturant took a year and $700 to build and furnish. The result was dissatisfying, and both of them realized they didn't know how to use the deep fryer. For the next twenty-five months, they had to put the project on hold, until they could find enough money to refurnish and hire staff. After 30 months, they pulled in $3000.28₡ to spend on their dream. YummyPlace became a place were you could eat something, albiet something disgusting. In a final attept to save YummyPlace (and their failing friendship) B.K went to the himilayas to the Dalai Lama to find the ingredient to save YummyPlace. Since the Dalai was a buddhist and was the equivalent of Satan (in goal), the Lama said he did have the solution, but he said the Burger King needed to sell his soul for it. B.K accepted his offer willingly, and thus he learned how to make Special Sauce. Once he came back to America, he showed his friend how to make the Sauce. The Sauce boosted sales by 800%, and the duo's friendship was as close as ever was.

Right nowEdit

KING DRIVE BY

BK: "It's just business. Nothing personal..."

After being sought for "questioning" in the drive-by shooting of Ronald McDonald.

McFuneral02:47

McFuneral

The King wins them all

...and the murder of the rest of the McDonald family The King went on "Vacation" [1]

Also, Colonel Sanders has staged a coup d'etat to restore democracy to American fast food, moving its capital to KFC city, Kentucky .

See alsoEdit

External TubesEdit

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